


for the Vines

by orphan_account



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-04
Updated: 2014-05-04
Packaged: 2018-01-21 22:20:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,010
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1566077
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>so I was bored and spent way too long watching really dumb Vines, and then I wondered what would happen if the Avengers set up a Vine account, so here's the horribly short product.</p>
            </blockquote>





	for the Vines

                It starts with a question.

“Do it for the Vine?” Darcy asks, a grin stretching across her face as she holds her phone out to Tony.  He watches her for a moment before winking and taking the phone.  He disappears into Steve’s bedroom.  Fifteen seconds later he’s running down the hall, laughing hysterically and holding the phone triumphantly in the air, Steve follows after immediately.  Darcy runs off to find Clint, and together they wait for the video to appear on the Avenger’s Vine account.

“For the Vine, for the Vine, go!” Tony chants to himself from behind the camera.  Steve is in view, sleeping soundly in his bed.  Tony’s arm appears, pulling the blankets from the super soldier and then his head slides into view, pressing a wet kiss onto Steve’s sleeping lips.  Steve jolts awake and Tony begins to run.  “After seventy years true love wakes Sleeping Beauty!” The video cuts out, frozen on Steve’s livid expression.  Clint and Darcy roar with laughter, and they hear Natasha laughing loudly in the hallway.  The door opens and she steps in, wiping a small tear from her eye and putting her phone back in the pocket of her sweatpants.

“What next?” She asks, a sly grin on her face.

“Well…” Darcy begins.

O.O

                It’s dangerous, it’s stupid, and it’s rude, but it’s all in good fun, so the trio goes for it.  From outside the lab, they can see Tony and Bruce working frantically, empty mugs littered on every surface.  It’s Darcy’s job to help keep the lab in working order, but she let it go for a few days, “for the Vine” she insists.  Clint and Nat know she’s just a bit lazy.  With a silent nod, Clint slips up into the air vent and the girls wait.  Darcy turns on her phone and starts recording just as an arrow drops from the ceiling and shatters the blue mug closest to Tony.  He jumps and shrieks.  Bruce looks up in time to see three more arrows shatter mugs around Tony.  Tony begins to run around the lab, mugs shattering all around him.  A mug next to Bruce’s work station shatters, and in a flash the Hulk is standing where Bruce had been, pulling down ceiling tiles until he finds Clint, holding the archer in one hand and roaring at him.  Natasha jumps up and runs into the lab, but Bruce has calmed down and Clint is nervously laughing. 

The Vine captures the fiasco from the first arrow to Bruce’s Hulk-out, but that’s enough.  Darcy has to upload it with the caption “The Hulk didn’t hurt anyone, just pulled Hawkeye out of the ceiling and then calmed down.”  It’s plastered on every social media site within minutes.  Clint holds his ice pack to his bruised ribs and grins.

“Worth it.”

O.O

                Natasha has the next great idea, and conveniently Thor is visiting when she tells Clint and Darcy.  They grin, and begin their planning.

“Harder than it should’ve been, but I think it’ll be great.” Darcy admits as they set up their cameras.  Thor has joined them now, being crucial to this particular prank.  Natasha has a tiny camera set up in the bathroom closest to the Avengers common room, and it was Darcy’s job to convince Thor to close the lid of the toilet and leave Mjolnir resting on top of it.  Clint was tasked with herding the rest of the team into the common room for a movie night, and then making sure everyone had drinks all night.

                It’s a masterpiece, a true stroke of brilliance, and Clint kisses Natasha in celebration when the videos go viral.  The results were too perfect to compile into one tiny Vine, so each victim has their own.  Tony struggles to lift the lid and ends up summoning one repulsor ray from his armor, to no effect other than burning the tiles on the wall.  Bruce walks into the room, sees the hammer, and leaves.  Pepper finds it and just stares at it for a moment before muttering something about passive-aggressive gods.  Jane leans into the hallway and shouts for Thor, before giving up and attempting to move it on her own.  Steve stares for a second, wraps one hand around the hammer’s handle, and picks it up, disappearing for a moment to set it into the hallway.  The video cuts out with Steve staring directly at the camera and sticking out his tongue.

O.O

“You’re crazy.” Darcy shrugs at Steve, the two sitting close together on the couch and talking in whispers.  Steve’s shaking his head at her.  “Really I think you’re certifiably insane.”

“So you’ll do it?” She asks, hopeful.  Steve sighs.

“For the Vine?”

“For the Vine.”

                It’s a terrible, terrible, terrible idea, and Steve almost regrets it.  Almost.  Natasha is asleep on the couch, curled up in a ball around one of Clint’s legs that he’d been resting on her chair all evening.  He can’t move from his spot opposite her on the couch, and Steve and Darcy are going to take every advantage of that.  They wait the archer out, and when he finally falls asleep, Steve approaches silently, quickly depositing half the can of shaving cream in Clint’s open hand.  He holds in a giggle as he positions himself behind the couch with Darcy, and she turns the camera on.  Steve quickly reaches down and tickles Clint’s upper lip.  He twitches his foot, which sets Natasha off at the same time he smears shaving cream all over his own face.  Natasha jumps on Clint, and he screams, covering both of them in shaving cream.  Steve and Darcy break out into loud laughter and both assassins turn to them.

                The rest of the team is as amused as Steve and Darcy, but Natasha threatens to call in a favor with the KGB if they try anything like it again.  Clint pretends to be offended by it, but Tony catches him watching the Vine on a loop later that night, laughing quietly the whole time.


End file.
